Exactly a year
with you

For my dear love, ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

My dear, my beloved, my often hungry but deeply loving Ayumi, I am not a person who is good with words. When I love something, my heart and my mind are trying to put it together, as best as they can, everything that I feel, so I will try to express myself as honestly and as purely as I can. ✎﹏﹏﹏﹏

My dear woman, I remember sitting on the bus, looking at my phone, when a girl named Ayumi messaged me. (It was in Katakana, but I could read it!) At that time, I was tired and thinking, who is this, what is this, should I look at it? Or should I block her? But I will admit to you, I felt an incredible curiosity and an attraction. From the very moment you messaged me, even though I did not know you yet, I felt something telling me, "SAMUEL, OPEN THAT MESSAGE!" And so I did, and because of that simple click, my life changed, not for worse, or for better.... But for the best and happiest! Every day, sometimes several times a day, I wonder if you are actually just a dream.. It is impossible that God would send me a woman who truly loves me, who truly feels love towards me. And in the worst moments, sometimes when the man is supposed to be emotionally stronger, you handle it better, you hug me and kiss me, you give me a home where all the bad thoughts melt into warmth and love, home, into the feeling that I have you, and when I have you, it means that I have a bright future, that I already have everything I ever needed to achieve in life. ˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

I know, I am not an easy person, sometimes I get offended like a child... "YES, I ADMIT IT!!" Sometimes during an argument I realize that I am not right... And I do not admit it.. But you? You are the one who often brings those arguments to an end.. After you start talking to me, and you start destroying that barrier of anger between us, I realize that you have something inside you that others do not, a longing for peace, for love, for unity, for the unity of two partners and lovers. And every day I remember those moments when you were the one who kept us together. My dear love, I just want you to know that I am aware, and that I notice so deeply, how beautiful, kind, and peaceful your soul is. You are the fire of my candle, which is my soul. 𝄞

My soul has always been surviving, it was tired, it was sad... It had no meaning, it was a period that I went through very painfully, and I was thinking about what to do with myself, I know that you experienced the same and that you wandered through pain and loneliness just like I did. We both had negative periods.... But.. When I think about it while writing this letter to you, what are the chances that two people who were both struggling through life would eventually be the ones who met each other? What are the chances that both of us are from completely different sides of the world, that the one from the other side would choose the country where his destined other half is? Coincidence???? In Japan there are 4,761 high schools, and now tell me, what were the chances that I would end up where you were... The chance of us finding each other was almost 0%. There is only one answer, our energy, our longing for love, loyalty, family, joy, togetherness, peace, and support, is something that was guided, and always has been, do you know why? Because God arranged it that way. God wanted us to have each other, to have us by each other's side, and that is what happened, and He brought into my life a woman who, with every step she takes, brings beauty and meaning, a reason why life is worth living, and why I have to live, and that is so that I can be with you forever. 𐚁

Your eyes, every time you opened the door to your home for me, were always the turning of a new chapter, a new page in a book, a book in which I realize more and more the uniqueness that you carry inside you, a uniqueness that even nature, nature which has all the colors of the world, does not have. You give me new feelings, deep inside me you create, in my deepest heart, colors that were never even created, you destroy all my ideas about what joy is because every single day you keep pushing those expectations higher and higher, because you exceed them every time I am with you! Your beautiful, clear, endless brown eyes, eyes that tell a story that cannot be told with words, only through a gaze, a gaze that leaves passion deep within the very core, the passion of your essence, your gaze creates in me a feeling of importance, a feeling that I have to try, not for myself, but for us. And that glow when we were riding the bus home, when the rays of sunlight reflected in your eyes and created a symphony that angels would sing with their magnificent arrival. ✈︎

My love, Moja láska, Meu amor, Moje Láska, Моя любовь, Meine Liebe. I love you and I always will! You are unique, you are something that cannot be expressed in words, you truly are a mystery that changes as you solve it, it changes because every time I think about it, I get lost in the beauty that spreads deeper and deeper. That hair of yours that changes color in the rays of the sun, those fingers on your hands that make my heartbeat faster when I touch them, those soft, warm thighs and legs that smell like melon scrub :). Those feet thanks to which you float like a queen, but not just any queen, my queen, my princess, my everything. ♛

During this year, I realized that love is not a curse, but a blessing that we have to wait for, it is a battle and a storm that separates us from pure love, and after a year we fought strongly together and removed those clouds and lightning that stood between us and that love, and therefore, this is not our last year, this is only the beginning, and it always will be, by me, by your side. Because we will achieve that pure, beautiful love, and we already have, and we will always fight side by side, in good times and in bad. In sickness and in health. 💕

I love you, Ayumi.

Your Samuel🤍